Really Does Intercourse Damage Ladies Long-Term Opportunities? | Women Chase

On my post about

user shame

, Ben questioned:

Could  you address the last concern that you bring- that asleep with women  injuries their ability to own long term relationships?

You made a relatively convincing case that psychologically, assuming you’re  attending flirt and go out and bring in women, not asleep together  actually doing them any favors.

Possibly we really really should not be fun and flirting with most women  (leaving out the ones who require an emotional get away or comparable I suppose)  from an emotional viewpoint?

Furthermore however, how do you validate flirting with women subsequently  resting together with them, realizing it destroys their ability to own future  relationships? This bothers me more than the psychological part.

-ben

The condition he is speaing frankly about ended up being where we paraphrased some ‘web wisdom’ cast about about women. A number of it claims sex is liberating to ladies. Some says intercourse is aggressive, oppressive, and patriarchal. Some say gender is actually empowering. Some say it destroys females for your long-term.

Those aren’t my viewpoints

; they are nonetheless common tropes you are going to encounter on the Internet.

Ben’s concern, though, is the one really worth discovering… particularly as it ties into the concept of member shame (which that article Ben commented on was about).

If you sleep with a woman, have you been harming the woman future prospective as a sweetheart, spouse, and mother?

An evergrowing motion online appears to have reached in conclusion “yes, sex destroys women’s futures.”

The men exactly who arrive at this realization though take a chain of logic that profits thus:

1. Ladies with larger quantities of gender partners tend to be,
   
   typically
   
   , worse associates and moms

2. Consequently, whenever men make love with women, they degrade ladies capabilities to-be capable associates and mothers

Although we do have an abundance of proof that

women are significantly less faithful the greater associates obtained

, so we’ve all heard anecdotes of reckless man-crazy single mothers ditching their unique kids to pursue the

homme du jour

, there’s a

large

causal hop between those two points. This casual jump of trust is when guys trip themselves upwards.

That is to say, ladies with high spouse counts tend to be (an average of) worse as mothers and lovers. This is exactly genuine.

But their unique companion matters are a



symptom



of why is them worse within these parts

— partner number is not necessarily the

reason

.

And when you are taking a woman to bed,

you

are also not ‘the reason’.